Wednesday, May 6, 2009
10:43 PM
i've got a effed up big problem it's super obvious but idk where it really lies, and idk what to do. bawled my eyeballs out today, once again. i really didn't understand why things are like that. i still don't, i really really don't. who doesn't know letting yourself zgdl won't change a thing. but somehow or rather, i'd choose to zgdl instead of trying hard. it's, easier. and i forgot how i reduced myself to this state, from what i rmb, i was already up and fighting, recovering well. took me 3 months, and counting. then now here comes another stupid shit, i don't even know where itcame from.

oh god, drop me a solution. or maybe, break down my thick skull and make me accept the fact that nobody is gonna wanna hear abt my soppy sad life and there's really only myself to rely on. yup, however much i hate that, no matter how much i'm used to seeking solace in the ppl ard me, i'll have to take it as a fact. time i broke down this nutshell and look life as it is supposed to be. but who am i kidding i know i'll just continue zgdling after this post.

till then, i'm shutting up. i'm always used to expressing my emotions, but ultimately, did it help in any way? possibly yes, for a moment, and i'm back to where i was. well then since it isn't useful then there's no point in doing so. prehaps keeping silent will make things better.